Awakened multiple times

Short repetitive scenes

Quick with presence

Disrupting the unseen

Mentally agonizing

Confusing, but deciphered

Why are you seen through the windows of the soul?

Residing at the brink

Latching onto thoughts

But it is whom ever starts the road

Who provides the liberty of thus to roam


One & Only

Last night I saw the smoky haze, making it’s curvy presence in between my eyes. Tears of regret washed away with my soul.

It was terrifying. Why? We were extensively tested and we were to weak to overcome those obstacles.

I wish l lived in the world where we were stronger.

Life was complete with you.
What manifested in between our fingers took over.
It was stronger than our love.
Although our connection faded,
I know there’s no one like you for me.
Till then I will remain my one and only.


Life as a Buddhist

Resilience is rewarded when it is least expected. We have to push forward whether with strength or not. Some are evil while in distress, but does that excuse us for deviating from acting righteously?

Learning a new religion has been extremely difficult, especially when others view it as anomalously. It has been over four years since I unraveled a life changing experience; although my dedication can be explained as a meager attempt to change my life, I will truly accept that I have tried to apply the noble eight-fold path in life towards enlightenment.

I quit, I start, I surrender, and then lastly I continue. One should learn to avoid bouncing back and forth, but only go through the cycle a few times before it being the last.


Words from a Wounded Soul

I will not cry. 
I will not be sad. 

I will not overthink about it. 
I will not let it defeat me. 

I will remember, but I will not let it take over. 
I will think about it from time to time, but it is only to make me stronger. 

You deserve better. 
He deserves better. 

We deserve others. 

When I met you, I knew you were him. 
That made me a better person. 
I was faithful for the first time, because I fell in love. 

First time for everything, but is it my last? 

Will I ever feel the same about a man again?  


delilahs interlude

It wasn’t sought, only thought of. Mentally prepped, which led to its manifestation. Lacking confidence ? Fix it the right way. Urging a sense of direction that’s given later on; interpret the message. Time ? It was used without success, but thank you universe for an ever lasting clock.

It was a matter of time. In a secular perspective, someone will always take care of another; whether in this world or not. Temptation becomes stealthy; creeping its way through the crevasses of a lie, but then it comes to light. With a meager interlude, it makes an appearance and destroys the rest.

Better yet, it awakens the rest.


How can last nights fire be mended?

Sitting under the shadow; observing the sunlight beam on its leafs.

Tranquility for the moment, but the heat will return.

It’s grand entrance will be marked by depression.

Professionals are sought. Doesn’t seem to make a difference.

Temptations derive, but not all will fail.

How can last nights fire be mended?


Library Theme

Allow me to be compendious.
It lets us notice that change is continuous,
and gives us motivation before it’s “up.”
It’s presence has evolved long before we did,
and it will remain indefinitely.

It continues even as we speak, work, sleep, or simply do nothing.
Why are we held accountable for it?
They say , “It is never to late,” but unfortunately I feel as if I am running out.
What exactly am I or are we running out of?

Is it energy? Because lord knows we all need a boost.
Unfortunately or fortunately, depends on you, it is time that we struggle with.
A ticking bomb that brings us to realization.
A realization we never came across as children.

Although life can be ever-lasting, simultaneously it is ephemeral.
We are to do nothing but live it until our “time” is up. 


Downtown JC

Being alone isn’t perceived as an option for most.
For most, happiness includes the opposite sex or maybe even a drug.
I agree, but those are not enough to placate those moments of loneliness dreaded throughout the years.
Without knowing how beautiful it is, we tend to seek anything that would supersede the past.

Capturing the essence of happiness, in my world, definitely includes the opposite sex,
But what else? It is family.
Although it is a patchy road, family makes us whole.

Well for the most of us…

It was morning when the translucent window provided the room with light
and we heeded that the night out was on repeat.
It would involve some drinks, a few walks, a nice joint, and a basement with music.
It was an opportunity to connect with not only family but a male cousin who is
open-mind analogous to Dr. Ruth, and always appreciated.

Night adventures and quality time with family definitely overrides the loneliness I once felt. Thank you for reconstructing the faith I did not have for myself.
Although you did nothing, you did something. It was those nights that helped me realize, I want to be alone.
At one point, it was needed but now I want it and it will be used on fortifying my soul.